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# -*- mode: org; org-confirm-babel-evaluate: nil; org-babel-noweb-wrap-start: "«"; org-babel-noweb-wrap-end: "»"; -*-
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#+TITLE: How to Assignate the Archbishop of Canterbury in 1170 CE
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* Summary
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This =How-To= tutorial provides a step by step guide on how to assignate the Archbishop of Canterbury in 1170 CE if you are Henry II of England.
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* Setup Instructions
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- Appoint your friendly chancellor as Archbishop of Canterbury in 1162 CE to reassert royal supremancy of English Church[fn:1].
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- When your plan falls part, get into 10 year pissing match with lots of other historical figures.
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- In 1170 CE
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- Get really upset when the Archbishop of Canterbury excommunicates a bunch of people you like.
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- Hold a Christmas party
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* Christmas Party Royal Guest List
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#+NAME: royal-guest-list-x-mas-1170-ce
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| Name | Title |
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|-------------------+--------|
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| Hugh de Morville | Knight |
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| Reginald Fitzurse | Knight |
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| William de Tracy | Knight |
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| Richard le Breton | Knight |
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| Henry II | King |
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* At the Party, Say this Phrase
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#+NAME: plausible-deniability
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#+BEGIN_SRC css :noweb yes
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"Will no one rid me of this turbulent priest?"
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#+END_SRC
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* Have Guests Play the Popular =Read between the Lines= Party Game
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1. Guess meaning of =Will no one= using Christmas Party Royal Guest List as Input.
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#+NAME: will_no_one_code
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#+BEGIN_SRC ruby :var guests=royal-guest-list-x-mas-1170-ce
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special_friends = guests.select!{|guest| guest[1] == 'Knight'}.map{|row| [row[0].split(/ /)[0]]}.sort
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[special_friends[0..2].join(', '), special_friends[3]].join(' & ')
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#+END_SRC
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2. Guess the meaning of =rid me of= using the =Christmas Party Royal Guest List= and the following =List of Phrases=
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#+NAME: list-of-phrases
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| List of Phrases |
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|---------------------------------------------|
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| seize and return to Normandy with |
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| apologize and give a large sum of money to |
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| request excommunication be undone by |
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| use those pointy sharp sticks I gave you on |
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#+NAME: rid_me_of_code
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#+BEGIN_SRC ruby :var guests=royal-guest-list-x-mas-1170-ce :var list_of_phrases=list-of-phrases
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list_of_phrases[guests.select!{|guest| not guest[1] == 'King'}.map{|row| [row[0].split(/ /)[0]]}.count - 1].join(' ')
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#+END_SRC
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3. Guess the meaning of =this turbulent priest?= using the =Christmas Party Royal Guest List= and the following =Famous Religious Personages=
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#+NAME: favorite-religious-personages
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| Famous Religious Personages |
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|---------------------------------------------|
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| God |
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| Jesus |
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| Holy Ghost |
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| Thomas Becket, the Archbishop of Canterbury |
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#+NAME: this_turbulent_priest?_code
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#+BEGIN_SRC ruby :var guests=royal-guest-list-x-mas-1170-ce :var favorite_religious_personages=favorite-religious-personages
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favorite_religious_personages[guests.select!{|guest| guest[1] == 'King'}.map{|row| [row[0].split(/ /)[0]]}.count + 2].join(' ')
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#+END_SRC
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4. Have Guests Leave the Christmas Party and Return with Correct Answer the Next Day.
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5. Reward Everyone that Guessed the Correct Answer to =Read between the Lines= Game
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* To see the correct answer execute the following Literate Program
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1. Encode What the King Said as Literate Program
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#+NAME: what_the_king_said
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#+BEGIN_SRC ruby :var the_king_said=plausible-deniability :wrap "SRC css :noweb yes" :exports results
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the_king_said.downcase!
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the_king_said.gsub!(/(will no one)/i,'«\1»')
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the_king_said.gsub!(/(rid me of)/i,'«\1»')
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the_king_said.gsub!(/(this turbulent priest[?])/i,'«\1»')
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the_king_said.gsub!(/([^«»]) /, '\1_')
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the_king_said
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#+END_SRC
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#+NAME: will_no_one
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#+BEGIN_SRC css :noweb yes :exports none
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«will_no_one_code()»
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#+END_SRC
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#+NAME: rid_me_of
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#+BEGIN_SRC css :noweb yes :exports none
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«rid_me_of_code()»
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#+END_SRC
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#+NAME: this_turbulent_priest?
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#+BEGIN_SRC css :noweb yes :exports none
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«this_turbulent_priest?_code()»
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#+END_SRC
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- *What the King Said*
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#+NAME: what_the_king_wanted
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#+RESULTS: what_the_king_said
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#+begin_SRC css :noweb yes
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«will_no_one» «rid_me_of» «this_turbulent_priest?»
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#+end_SRC
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- *What the King Wanted*[fn:2]
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#+BEGIN_SRC css :noweb yes :exports both
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«what_the_king_wanted()»
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#+END_SRC
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#+RESULTS:
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: Hugh, Reginald, Richard & William use those pointy sharp sticks I gave you on Thomas Becket, the Archbishop of Canterbury
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* Common Export Settings :noexport:
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#+OPTIONS: ':nil *:t -:t ::t <:nil H:4 \n:nil ^:{} arch:headline
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#+OPTIONS: author:nil broken-links:nil c:nil creator:nil
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#+OPTIONS: d:(not "LOGBOOK") date:nil e:t email:nil f:t inline:t num:nil
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#+OPTIONS: p:nil pri:nil prop:t stat:nil tags:t tasks:nil tex:t
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#+OPTIONS: timestamp:nil title:nil toc:nil todo:nil |:t
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#+SELECT_TAGS: export
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#+EXCLUDE_TAGS: noexport nolatex
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# For Display when file is exported with org-ruby
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#+EXPORT_SELECT_TAGS: export
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#+EXPORT_EXCLUDE_TAGS: noexport
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* Footnotes
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[fn:1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Becket_controversy
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[fn:2] 'Write ten page of prose unrelated. Somewhere in footnotes "Oh by the way, we killed the priest"', Twitter post by @Di4na0 on 2019-06-08
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